Add “Not That”

I met a young client this week who was stuck in a negative cycle whilst looking to take the next step in his career.

He kept saying over and over again.

“It’s hard.”

“It’s difficult.”

“It’s tough out there.”

As we spoke, I wrote down on a piece of paper, add “not that.”

He looked at me quizzically as I explained that instead of saying, “It’s hard,” he could say, “It’s not that hard.”

It was a way of validating the challenge without looking at it in a negative way.

Yes, it’s difficult, but all of a sudden it becomes more manageable and less intimidating.

And it’s applicable in a range of contexts.

Being a parent is difficult.

Or being a parent is not that difficult.

Running your own business is brutal.

Or running a business is not that brutal.

Life is hard.

Or, it’s not that hard.

I don’t know what challenges you’re facing, but I suspect that just like the young man I met this week, some things are hard.

But they’re not that hard!

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