Can you be too encouraging?
Can you give your wife (or husband) too many compliments?
Can you notice too many things that your kids do right?
Can you catch your employees doing an awesome job too often?
Can you build up the confidence of those around you too much?
Can you say too many nice things?
Can you write too many encouraging emails or notes to people telling them what you appreciate about them?
Can you look for the good in people and tell them what you see too regularly?
Can you notice it when people are down and lift their spirits with a smile and warm comment too often?
Can you be too unrestrained in telling people what they’ve done right and too restrained in telling them what they’ve done wrong, rather than the other way around?
Is it possible to be too encouraging?
Yes or no?
If the answer’s no, what are you going to do about it?
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8 comments
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August 11, 2011 at 1:04 am
Don
YES!
People can be too encouraging. First, it becomes annoying. Secondly, if a person is too encouraging, soon the words of encouragement mean nothing.
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August 11, 2011 at 9:24 am
Darren Poke
Thanks Don, you make some good points. My suspicion is that we are more likely to not be encouraging enough than be too encouraging, but I can certainly see your point.
Thanks for taking the time to comment.
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August 11, 2011 at 7:33 am
Chris
Yes, you can overdo it, so that people don’t believe anymore that it is really meant. I had a girlfriend, who found everything great I do and wanted anything I had. I lived in a bigger house, had nicer clothes and I just knew that her “compliments” where not seriously meant. If you give a compliment, but say what you don’t like, which might be a tiny thing, you’ll be taken more serious.
But it is different with being encouraging. Here I am with you. You can’t be too encouraging. Just continue to encourage anyone as often as possible.
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August 11, 2011 at 11:25 am
Darren Poke
Thanks Chris, you’re right, the sincerity behind encouragement is important as well.
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August 11, 2011 at 12:44 pm
Stacey Kirkpatrick
Generally-No. The world is full of negative people so I encourage everyone to give sincere compliments to as many people as you can. Say thank you and show gratitude to more people. Even just a warm smile and a thank you to the person serving your coffee or the cleaner mopping the hall will make a difference. When is the last time you said thank you to someone in your office who always goes the extra mile (send them an email and copy their boss). How many times do you “correct” your kids or say “No”. Try finding things they are doing well and say “Yes” once in awhile. Watch Randy Pausch’s “Last Lecture”-it’s on You tube if you want a perspective on kids and letting them dream a little (or a lot). http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo
Just make sure you are sincere and you’ll have no problems!
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August 11, 2011 at 7:59 pm
Darren Poke
Thanks Stacey, I love that speech.
I agree, sincerity is a big key.
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August 11, 2011 at 1:21 pm
Debbie
Loving the discussion going on here! I understand what Don is saying. We don’t want to come off as annoying. And to keep from it becoming meaningless, maybe being more specific would help with that. In general, I think that being encouraging can be a life style, just a part of us, so that when we are around others, we naturally do it, in natural ways and simple kindnesses and words and attitudes, that build people up instead of tearing them down. Just my thoughts! Thanks, Darren!
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August 11, 2011 at 8:02 pm
Darren Poke
Thanks Debbie, you’re a natural encourager and that’s always welcome here.
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