Photo by Thomas Hawk via Flickr

Today is Valentine’s Day.

It’s a special day for Karen and I because it was on Valentine’s Day 16 years ago that we started dating.

We’ve certainly been blessed in our relationship and we have now been married for over 14 years and have three great kids.

As I think about relationships on this day I’m reminded of the story of the married man who went to see a marriage counselor.

“I don’t feel any love for my wife anymore.”  he confessed to the therapist.

The therapist looked at him and asked, “When was the last time you acted in love for her?”

“It doesn’t really matter because I don’t feel anything for her anymore.”

“You didn’t answer the question, when was the last time you acted in love for her?”

“And you’re not hearing me.  I don’t feel any love for her anymore!” the man answered in frustration.

“Perhaps you misunderstand love.  You think of it as a feeling, but it’s really a verb.  You think that if you feel something for her then you’ll do something for her but it’s really the other way around.  Act in love for her in a manner that’s totally selfless and without presumption of receiving something in return and you’ll feel love again.”

The man grumbled as he left the session, but he had promised to give it a try.

A week later the man returned for his appointment.

“It worked!”  he pronounced, “And I’m in love with her again.”

The counselor nodded and smiled as the man left to continue his journey with his wife.

On this day of love, remember that romantic feelings can and do wane.

Love is a verb.  Act in love and watch your emotions follow.

To my beautiful wife, thanks for the past 16 years.  I love being married to you and I look forward to continuing our journey of love together.

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